This is the way it is when a guy says "Wanna step outside?"

You have no choice. You have to go outside and you

have to say, "All right, let’s go right now." And in your

mind you are willing and ready to accept the fact that

your teeth might get knocked out and your nose busted,

or maybe since he is always a giant, he’ll be slow

and lumbering and you can dive, fists flying at his face

and all the time your wife is saying, "Let’s just leave."

But you cannot, it is impossible, something in your

bones and blood and brain tells you in no uncertain

terms that you have to do this thing. Your eyes tighten,

your fists become rocks, your skin and muscles harden

in a flash and the truth is you have it in you to kill

a man because you are designed that way. Your

wife hates it and loves it and hates it and loves it

and hates it and loves it and hates it and loves it.

Nine times out of ten he will back down

because he senses and sees and knows you

have snapped and someday, someday, someday,

your son will walk around your backyard

in the rain shivering and talking and grabbing

toys to mess with and will not come into the house

and he will like being wet and cold getting on his

tricycle and playing with an old fishing rod.

And someday you will be canoeing with your

boy on a river and he will not want to stop and

you two will shout at the river and trees and rocks

and sky and silence with big mouths and hats

pulled way down over your eyes and he will turn

to you and say, "This is nice, Dad, really nice."